So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Randomize