it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
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It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
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Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
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