so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
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