So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize