is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
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