Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
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