my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
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