therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
we should paint friendship bongs
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