how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
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