you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
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