Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Randomize