I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
Randomize