Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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