dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
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