i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
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It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
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OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
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