Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
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