Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
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