Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
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