I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
Randomize