Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize