Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
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It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
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