Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
and you fell through a lawn chair
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
Randomize