Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize