I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
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