Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you told grandpa to call you daddy
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
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