Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
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Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
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I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Two words: nipple clamps
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