God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
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