i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
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