he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
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