just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Hippo gnu deer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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