well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Randomize