Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Randomize