her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
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