Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
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