..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize