so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
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