Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boob is missing a layer of skin
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
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