I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
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