Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
That reminds me...we need to get swords
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Randomize