If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
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After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
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