We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Randomize