I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
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Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
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Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
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