your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Randomize