She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dear awkwardly drunk roommate, thanks for stuffing enough change in my clevage that I could afford a pepsi at work today. Sincerely awesome roommate that put up with your drunk ass
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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