you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
bring money and cleavage
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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