Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize