His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
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It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
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I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
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