I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
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