It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
we're so committed to being not committed
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
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