Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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